Decisions are not good or bad

From few days i am trying to compromise with myself because whats happening with us is not easy, here is a email which was exchanged recently :

From: CEO
Sent: Monday, May 16, 2011 5:03 PM
To: Abdul Jabbar
Subject: Our Discussion

Jabbar,

It is not possible for you to do both jobs unfortunately and therefore I need to know your decision, if you will stay with Blue we are very happy, if you go and work for your father I am delighted for you and your family. If you confirm that you will leave we need to do a one month handover period and organize your replacement so please confirm ASAP.

Thanks.

then i replied on the same stating the following:

From: Abdul Jabbar
Sent: Wednesday, May 18, 2011 11:06 AM
To: CEO
Subject: RE: Our Discussion

Sir,                                                                                                                                                                              

As per our discussion regarding working with my fathers business does not mean that I would be in Blue Truck visa and will be working for my father, but I would be on my own visa and then do the freelance for Blue Truck, if you think this was a wrong decision I apologize for it.

I wish to continue with Blue Truck but due to following reasons I was forced to take this decision:

1-My salary is not so enough where I can cover the petrol allowance on my own

2-I worked in the company for last 8 years, if I am in this position its all because of your support, but then it doesn’t mean that I should leave my self respect.

3-I feel so embarrassed when ever I go out for any work related to job I should come and ask you or others for petrol (example yesterday I got the petrol money from Mr. Raid)

4-These 8 years of my experience with Blue Pages/Blue Truck I never put myself so down as much I am for this last six months due to office atmosphere

5-I respected you and I always respect you, my idea of leaving the company was just to avoid the issues from accounts, so that I need not be using the company car or petrol.                                                                                                                                                                                

My decision Benefits for blue truck:

1-Company car rental will be saved

2-Company petrol will be saved (which they are having problems)   

3-Jobs will be done as normal we are applying and getting NOC

Sir, if there is no solution then I will resign and would be glad to train my next replacement and leave even if my decision is acceptable or not.

Thank you

Abdul Jabbar Bhatti

BP Ext. 102